Practice
Zen Lessons 2026 4 22
Community Zen, liturgy and meditation, at 6 tonight. 70 West Oakland Ave #103, Doylestown, PA. Free. Enter from the lot in back.
Oh my. So I learned to use a spreadsheet in a most rudimentary manner, to finish my (late) taxes. And acuity is very high among my clients and patients. I notice that there is a different quality to my thoughts recently… faster, more crowded. Not unusual for me in Springtime; usually gardening and family stuff allows me to focus on one thing at a time, which slows all this down. But the war. And my patients and clients. And a lot of new people with very distinctive needs and difficulties.
A large cognitive load. So what to do?
When life is moving fast and our reactivity and general sense of being pressured increases, sitting meditation is more challenging. My WWII era, Korea born, old school late Zen teacher never directly acknowledged that practice for him could be scattered and less focused. But you could see the distraction at times in his temper, his cooking, his getting latched onto a certain solution for a vexing problem. That was him being human. Seeing this was helpful.
He gave a clue about both his changing focus one day. “When I was young, sitting, my mind would go from here (pointing downward) to the end of the universe, and right back.” Then he smacked the table. “What about now?” I asked. “Not too much now”, he answered.
Anyways, we change. And the pressures are intense. I found myself driving myself very hard the last two days, both with work, thinking about the news, and with physical training. The workday was intense. I decided to check my blood pressure, out of curiosity. 156/90! Unlike last year when a reading like that at the doctor sent me into a panicked spiral (sending it up to 190, lol), this time I just saw another patient and then meditated a little. Checked the BP again. 105/50. Lowest reading in months.
Who knows. I am pretty good at taking care of myself, so there is that. And I experience a lot of cultivated self-power. But the quality of our mind, and our practice, our work, our moment to moment in relationships… this isn’t always something we can shape or change. Like my old teacher noting that he’s left the old way of mystical power behind, or me freaking myself out… these aren’t in our control, always. So it is good and healthy to relinquish that desire, that attachment to being what we want to be.
This is, sort of, a way of acknowledging karma, or the infinitely complex web of life and its causes and effects. Sometimes, we are just experiencing an edge of all that, that we are the life of that karma. Or rather, my panic or momentary confusion isn’t a lapse of discipline or a failure of training. Its just… me.
Getting overwhelmed comes in a lot of ways. Some of us get bored, or sleepy. Or distracted. Or angry. Knowing what we typically do, that is, awareness, is a really good step. Its healthy. It lets us experience ourselves as much more than the simple hero or victim of our self stories.
Getting past all that is good work.
Oh, and also, we are putting this on in lovely Frenchtown, NJ… a meditation and poetry reading, writing, reciting time. If you ever wanted to try sitting with others and then just making a poem on the spot, speaking from the spirit, Quaker-style; or sitting meditation and then taking time to write what comes, and sharing it with others; or sharing a poem you love and that helps you hold yourself or get beyond yourself… here is your chance. We are doing this on Saturday at 6, and on July 25th, at 6. Free.
